Anyway, Ko Samet turned out to be the best beach on my whole trip. Since it was my first real beach ever, I didn't know that, of course, so I travelled on after just 3 days. Time passed very quickly on the island. The first proof of this came just after we landed on the beach on the picture, in a very picturesque boat. We were quickly surrounded by the local taxi armada, claiming that the best beach was far away, maybe 30 minutes, so we would need to be taken there by car. So, we got onto the car, paid 10 baht for the ride, and after what seemed like only 3 minutes we were on the faraway beach. Amazing, really.
For 100 baht per night, I got myself a fairly nice bungalow, with a cold water shower, a big bed with a mosquito net and a table fan and the promise of some electricity every now and then. On such a small island it's very easy to meet other people, as you bump into the same faces everywhere. And in the evenings there's nothing to do but to eat, watch a pirated movie on VDO (Thai for "video") and then go down to the bar at the beach and listen to music, whether it's whatever is blasting out of the loud speakers or it's someone playing the guitar.
When you read travel guides for South-East Asia, there are a few big no-no's that can be found in all of them. One is "DON'T USE DRUGS!". This piece of advice is a bit exaggerated. On small islands like this one there is no police. And if there is no police, there will most definitely be drugs for sale, at the very least marihuana. For 200 baht (US$8 at the time), you could get a nice bundle of it at Diamond Bar on Ko Samet. And all the Americans seemed to think it a fair price. I can recommend the pineapple juice, although it's a pity that non-alcoholic drinks aren't included in the happy hour system.
The tourists that go to this island is a really mixed load of people. There's a lot of Thais, escaping from the city life, here, but most seemed to be Western people that just popped by, more or less by random. The strangest ones I came upon was a Canadian mini-family; A blond mother (thirty-something) with two blond daughters, of 12 and 16, let's call them "Mom", "12" and "16". "Mom" took them both to the bar every night, and "16" got about 4 lessons in "How to drink tequila" from her mother, while "12" happily feasted on beer. Just after midnight, "Mum" and "12" called it a day and left, while "16" totally refused to leave quite yet. She was obviously having a good time, with at least 5 men fighting for her attention. 20 minutes later she went off behind a dune with two of the bartenders. So. Errr... I found it an interesting anthropological observation. The only education the bartenders had, seemed to be having seen "Cocktail" with Tom Cruise at least a hundred times, before putting up their bar with neon lights on the beach. It looks a bit bizarre, but they've got a steady supply of customers there.
It was after having tired of watching the bar scene I discovered The
Late Night Show of the jungle. I went for a walk, bringing a
flashlight, and I was enchanted by all the sounds around me. So I
walked just a few meters into the jungle, sat down on the ground and
turned off the light. Whoa! Three minutes later the noise from all the
insects around me was incredible, and there were "something" moving in
all the bushes nearby. Now, THAT was fascinating.
Not yet knowing I was leaving the best beach on my trip, I invested 30 baht in a ticket which took me from the island to Ban Phi, from where I could get an air-conditioned ride to Pattaya for 120 baht. Uhm... Yes. Pattaya. It's THE place not to visit when you're an innocent, Scandinavian, male backpacker like me, so I had to go there. I had heard so many stories and been warned so many times about it, that it was impossible to resist a couple of nights there. The minivan that took me there also carried two "locals"; Libu and Charles. Today was Charles' birthday, and they were going to the city to celebrate. I was a bit worried about the amount of make-up they had on, so I politely declined an offer of staying in their hotel room for free. Still, they got me a cheap room (150 baht) in a good hotel, and invited me to dinner that evening.
Now, I was way taller and uhm... more musculous than them, so I figured I'd be able to survive having dinner with them. They picked me up at my room early in the evening, and I was in for a biiiig surprise before dinner: They took me to Tiffany's, the best transvestite cabaret in Pattaya, and probably also in the world. I wouldn't know, not having been to anything like it before, but it was very impressive. So, having enjoyed that, I was ready for dinner. But no, there was more! Libu and Charlie apparently had been in the city before, as they seemed to know the whole cast of the show. This resulted in us being invited backstage. So there I was, young, naive and Norwegian, right in the middle of a bunch of young, nude, Thai men, who had female bodies so perfect I'd never thought them possible. Now, THAT was confusing.
Luckily they started talking, and for some reason they don't do anything to change their voices, so I was abruptly brought back to reality, and could politely shake them off me as soon as they started showing some interest. If I ever decide to have a sex change, I know where to go. The Thai surgeons must be the best.
All the time, Charlie kept feeding me chewing gum. Being the farmboy I am, I simulated gum chewing all night, suspecting the gum to be filled by some kind of drug which would make me sleep, so that I could be taken advantage of. It was quite a struggle, chewing gum with no gum for hours. At last we went to some seafood restaurant at the pier, and had a delicious, multiple course dinner, before I thanked them for a quite unusual evening and went to the hotel, locked the door and tried some of the gum I had not chewed but put into my pocket throughout the evening. It didn't make me sleep or anything. Oh well. I had fun.
Before leaving Pattaya the very next afternoon, I spent a few hours watching the life on Beach Road. It's a very sad and depressive sight. You see fat, ugly, old European men, walking hand-in-hand with very much younger, fairly attractive, smiling Thai girls wearing uhm... not very much. It's strange how these men can walk around in Thailand, showing off their paid-for partners, seeming almost as proud of the women as of their big bellies, which somehow turns into the ultimate symbol of status as soon as all other symbols, like the Rolex, the Mercedes and the yacht doesn't quite have the same attraction anymore. Anyway, I felt really, really ashamed about the way Europeans have destroyed this part of Thailand and all those Thai women. Others shouldn't do as I did, but listen to the warnings and stay clear of Pattaya.
I was happy to leave.